Unholy SugarAces Casino
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The Platinum Tag Team Job
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The Platinum Tag Team Job
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“Now, now. Don’t reach for that gun. I’m not here to fight you. I’m here to make you an offer. You give me the manuscript, I walk away, and we both pretend this never happened. You keep your money, your reputation, and your attachment to your spleen.”
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Don Tonkatsu: (laughing bitterly) “…You think I’m afraid of you? You’re one man against my entire crew.”
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“Ah, but here’s the thing about estimates. They don’t account for the variables you haven’t met yet.”
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Before Don Tonkatsu can respond, chaos erupts at the bar.
Act V: The Chaos
KINTOKI: (standing on the bar, pointing dramatically at the ceiling) “EVERYONE! I have an announcement! This casino is a front for money laundering! The roulette wheels are rigged! The cards are marked! Also, I am DESTROYING CORRUPTION just look into my sexy blue eyes!”
SECURITY GUARD: (rushing over) “Get down from there right now, you little—”
KINTOKI: (doing a backflip off the bar, landing on the guard’s shoulders, then spring boarding off to crash into a waiter’s tray) “I AM THE SWORD OF JUSTICE! THE BEAM OF HOPE! THE SEXINESS You’ve been waiting or all your lives!”
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(moving through the chaos like water through pipes, slipping past panicked gamblers and terrified staff, his eyes fixed on a door marked “Private”) “…Kin’s louder than I thought.”
He slips through the door while the security team is distracted by Kintoki’s one-man war against furniture.
Inside the private room, Toji finds a safe hidden behind a painting. He doesn’t bother with the lock— he simply rips the door off its hinges.
(retrieving the manuscript, flipping through it with disinterest) “…Pages of doodles and curse theory. Some kid’s homework, probably.” (tucking it into his jacket) “Well. Job’s done.”
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Act VI: The Escape
By the time security reaches the VIP lounge, Gintoki is gone. Don Tonkatsu sits frozen at the table, staring at a phone that now contains photographic evidence of every illegal transaction his organization has ever made—uploaded remotely to every police database in the country.
Don Tonkatsu: (quietly) “…I’m going to kill that silver-haired bastard.”
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(from the doorway, winking) “I’d say ‘try it,’ but it would be a lost cause.” (tossing Don Tonkatsu a casino chip) “For your troubles. Better luck next time… if there is a next time.”
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Outside, the three reconvene in a back alley, the manuscript changing hands.
(breathing hard, but laughing from all the running) “Did I do good?! I took down four guys! Well, three guys and a decorative potted plant! The plant was really in the way!”
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(patting Kin on the shoulder) “You did great. Very heroic. Very stupid. Exactly what I’d expect. This was very different from our usual jobs. You kinda look like you enjoyed it! “
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(already walking away, the manuscript secured) “Payment’s been transferred to your account. Don’t spend it all in one place.”
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“Hey, Toji! Same time next month? I hear there’s a underground fight ring in Shibuya that’s looking for new ‘talent.'”
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(without turning around) “…I’ll think about it.”
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(watching Toji disappear into the night) “He’s cool, isn’t he? And kinda scary! Efficient.”
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(starting to walk off, hands in pockets) “He’s cool alright, but got plenty of inner demons, like someone I know. Now come on—I promised you steak.”
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Yeah… (perking up) “Really?! With extra sauce?!”
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